Welcome to T & A High, where the entire student body including campus virgin Purity Busch, chronic masturbator Melvin Jerkovski, repressed Principal Stuckoff and blonde bombshell Bootsie Goodhead all must rise to the challenges of freshman breast exams, bikini cheerleader attacks, inappropriate uses of bowling ball holes and much more.

What happens when four high school screw-ups are forced to attend an academy summer school to graduate? They turn their scholastic sentence into a wacky game of trying to improve their scores... with the women. The ultimate conquest for the 100-point prize is the sexy new French teacher, but she proves to be a bigger challenge than their failing grades. The unforgiving principal foils every scheme, and their sidesplitting last chance is the academy's anniversary celebration.

Within two weeks, Sgt. Hardbutt has to clean up the crime in the streets before the Governor arrives. Hardbutt is forced to supplement his overworked staff with civilian "recruits" who he schemes to use to a disastrous advantage.