A middle class London lad’s gangster fantasies go awry when his dodgy uncle puts them into debt to a real life crime boss. Still pulling strings from behind bars, the kingpin’s only desire is to conceive an heir by smuggling his sperm to his wife on the outside. There’s only one way the boys know how to raise the money fast … hijack the ‘baby juice express’. But kidnapping ‘baby juice’ turns out to be fraught with even more peril than the bumbling wannabes could possibly have imagined in this cheeky spin on the gangster genre. Starring Nick Moran (Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels), with Julian Clary (one of Britain’s funniest) and Joe Bugner (former boxing champion and one of Australia’s toughest!).

The film interrelates a number of real-life experiences of crime, growing up and relationships. It was filmed around Chippenham, including Karma nightclub, Revolutions restaurant and The Audley Arms. It also features more than 100 people from right across the South West, many of whom were from the North Wiltshire Young People’s Theatre Group.

A man visits a prostitute but just wants to talk. She goes along with it until he starts asking questions. Is he just a loner or is there a different reason for him to come here?